On yer bike then….

Cycling is something that I have greatly enjoyed over a number of years. At one stage I was really into it and it was nothing to go for a 6-7 hour ride on the wonderful bike trails of Melbourne and Mt. Dandenong fire access roads. I even did some of those multi-day rides all over Victoria. It got me very fit at the time. I developed something close to Jurrasic thighs and calves the size of a cow heart.

I have had some great high-tech bikes including a GT RTS3 which was one of the original dual suspension bikes introduced in the mid-90s. Darius is now exercising the custodianship over that machine. Almost a family hairloom.

So coming to Saudi I thought why not get a bike to re-kindle some of those great riding experiences. Ah but what to get? The choices and the technology are truly bewildering. But the answer was obvious. The prevalent bicyle type here is the quintessential Third World bike that is found by the hundreds of millions in India, China and Africa.

It’s the ultimate workhorse of the planet’s villages, farms and unpaved roads. It would also be an ultimate pose bike on the Boulevards and Corniches of the West. It's so retro it's beyond cool!

I had a choice of either a Hero or Atlas. Both are made in India and are a more-or-less identical in design. Built to take a trashing and ferry mind boggling loads. No precision engineering here. Lightweight components!! Gotta be kidding! These are tanks. Heavy steel tubing, tractor seats with spring suspension, push/pull rod brakes, cattle-horn handlebars, single speed, heavy steel stand, cargo rack.

But you know what? It’s gorgeous. Have a look!

I absolutely love the cheap decals and decorations. It also somewhat ambitiously and optimistically carries a “Export Quality” decal of somewhat dubious credibility. Where is Consumer Affairs when you need them to uphold the truth in marketing?

The high quality plastic ornament. Almost like a Mercedes-Benz

Here are some other details featuring the fine design and perhaps “not so precision” engineering. For example the tractor seat. Laugh if you will but it’s supremely comfortable.

The cockpit :

And what is the price of this fine machinery one may ask. It is all of 270 Riyals. That makes it AUD 82. Since the thing weighs about 17 kilos it makes it about $ 4.80 a kilo.

The added benefit is that it will make me much more suave and manly as can be seen from this marketing illustration where the female is irresistibly drawn towards the alpha male who is displaying his superior breeding qualities by the astute choice of his vehicle.

Oh and BTW I have not gone for a ride as yet. Too bloody hot!!!